Curbed Horror Stories are firsthand reader reports about terrible Miami rental experiences past and present. This week, in honor of Renters Week, we're having a rental horror story showdown across all Curbed sites, with the National winner receiving a staycation. It's time for the two renter tales submitted to face off.
Both Miami stories come from the landlord's point of view. One landlord was brave enough to rent their Little Havana unit to a known porn producer, but considering the neighborhood and the fact they guy did actually have a job they figured it seemed like an OK bet. The guy disappears. Turns out he relapsed, when on a 'crack binge,' sold all their furniture, and left the place a wreck, full of filthy clothes and a hammer. "The blunt of this hammer had blood and particles of what I imagine to be part of someone's skull." With no actual dead body to ascribe said bloody skull particles to, the police refused to investigate.
The other story also has to do with, you guessed it, drugs and damage. Hey, this is Miami. A landlord rents out their Ocean Drive unit to a couple of young French men who worked for a business associate. Things went well for a while, then the men started acting disoriented and sloppy. They seemed drunk or high all the time, the landlord paid an unannounced visit and found more people inside, seriously stoned, with all the legs cut off of all of the furniture, like some satanic ritual was going on or something. They were out the next day.
Pick your favorite, and that tale advances to compete against renter horror stories from other cities. The poll closes at midnight EST tonight, Thursday, June 4.